That One Time Topless Turkish Women Bathed Me

So now that I have my trip to Morocco booked, I'm reminiscing about the last trip abroad I took which was for the Other Goldfish Poodle's birthday. We went to Turkey and Greece and it was amazing.

I posted about getting caught up in deadly riots in Athens here, but I realize now I never wrote anything about the Turkey part of that trip.

Including: The Turkish Bath.

THIS is what it looked like:

Except all women...topless....

Except my lady was much larger, and also topless and just wearing bikini bottoms...and my face was red.....

TMI? You betcha. My new friend Mary (its amazing how quickly a new friend becomes a rather close friend when you are laying nearly-naked together on a giant slab of marble...) and I were the only brave female souls to venture there from our group of 12. The boys went too but thankfully they had a separate room. THAT would've been far too much information for all involved. *shudder*

It's hard to put into words what it's like to have a grown woman who speaks another language scrub you down with a loofa. I guess I really had no idea what I was getting into until we recieved a bag in the dressing room and all it contained was:

a pair of black underwear.

Well, I think we had a robe and shoes too but once you entered the large room where everyone else was, it was Skin To The Wind!

There was a giant slab of marble in the middle where ladies like myself sprawled out like embarrassed beached whales. A group of Turkish women rotated around the slab, scrubbing all of us down without saying anything to us really. Then we got up and had an ice cold rinse and shampoo at a sink in another part of the room, then a dip in a warm pool in yet another room. I'm assuming the experience is to get rid of dead skin cells and relax but all I really got out of it was a new facet of humility, and several laughs with Mary.

The rest of our stay in Turkey was much less embarrassing and very very pleasant. Istanbul is the cleanest big city I've ever seen and everyone was so friendly. People just wanted to have tea and spend time with us. I was also proposed to by a very attractive Turkish man who told me he could give me a "Big Happy Life" there. Besides needing to get used to having naked women scrub me down for fun, it wasn't a bad proposal to consider really. I should probably look that guy up.....

I'll try to post some more pics of that trip here at some point. I'll also have to tell the story of my "ambiguous ethnicity" and the "original nose" ....stay tuned.