Stories from the Campaign Trail finale


I did nearly get chased while knocking on doors as well. It was one of the last houses I knocked on and the lady that answered saw my Romney sticker and immediately began yelling at me so much her young son had to be the one to point out that she "shouldn't be rude!" Even as I started backing away, making it known that I got it! She wasn't voting Republican! - she continued to yell about how would I feel if she knocked on my door, blah blah blah. 

And I'm sorry, yes - I knocked on your door. I didn't strangle your cat or key your car. You have a doorbell on your house - I rang it. Sue me. You have the option of not answering your door at all. (Next time, I'm totally keying her car... JUST KIDDING!) 

But choosing to exercise the option of just not opening your door did not occur to the people in this area. Other folks campaigning with us said they encountered everything from a man opening the door in nothing but a speedo, to a woman sticking her head out the 2nd floor window from her shower to yell down that she couldn't get the door right then. 

Just ignore the bell, folks. Trust me, I'll happily just leave a door-hanger and jump right back in my clown's pocket and move on.

There was one house, however, where I was glad the person (we'll call him Hot Guy) opened the door. ...for a second, anyway. Rebekah and I switched off all day on who would do the talking, and would jot down the person's answers. (we had to ask questions about their intent to vote. It got to the point where I felt like I was saying "yes and what time do you plan to vote on election day? What are you planning on wearing? Do you believe you will have anything stuck in your teeth at the time of your voting experience?....." I got tired of hearing myself....)

I also just got tired, period. Which brings us back to Hot Guy. Hot Guy opens his door and I was trying desperately to ask "can Governor Romney count on your support" but I could not get it out. I stammered "Can Romney.." then I got tripped up in my head about the fact that I just referred to a presidential candidate as "Romney" as if we are frat brothers. Meanwhile Hot Guy keeps staring at me with an amused look on face. I try again "Can the support...governor....can I count ...support...." finally Rebekah has to jump in and explain that it had been a long day....

Sigh.

But I wasn't the only one having trouble staying coherent. At another house, the person I was with blurts out "we are here for the Ryan/Romney campaign!" then immediately shoots me a look like, "did I really just demote Mitt Romney to the Vice President portion of this ticket?" So we all had issues.

I had other issues as well. One house we stopped at had a man wearing a baseball cap with writing in another language on it. He was super friendly and at one point he pointed to his hat and asked, "Do you know what language this is?" And I've traveled fairly extensively and I've definitely seen that writing before but in my tired state, couldn't figure out where, so I guessed - "Arabic?"

It was Hebrew.

Yep. If you are trying to win friends, you definitely want to mix up those two groups of people: Arabs and Jews. I am awesome. The man's face agreed.

Anyway, we move on to another neighborhood and this one. is. niiii-eeece. I'm so busy looking dreamily at these huge houses that I barely realize how cold I'm getting. But it was getting super cold, so much so that I finally breakdown and put on the big headband thingy I brought just in case. I never wear headbands, I don't think I look very good in them, so I ask Rebekah if I look stupid. She cocks her head and surmises "No. You look like a rich skier." Which, given the neighborhood, we agreed was probably a good look. Here's the final outfit:


Pointing to my campaign sticker

I posted that on my Facebook and my friend - a prominent Democrat - posted something about how much I looked Republican in that photo because "ain't no one in the Democratic headquarters dressed that well." 

Ha! At least we could continue to joke with each other through the election. You know, instead of ending our friendship in a fiery crash of political dissent -- which I feel like probably did happen to some people.

All in all, the campaign was a fun experience. Even the dreaded bus trip back had bright moments, like when they showed the movie Elf, or when the guy across the aisle asked to borrow Rebekah's phone because he had somehow accidentally dropped his in a cocktail he had apparently made himself on the bus ride up. (That happened to be the same guy who nearly fought a man wearing pajamas while door knocking -- makes sense, right?)

In any case, I'm just glad the election is over and I have four long years to decide whether I ever want to go door knocking again....